How a thirty minute conversation can change your life
I nervously sat beside my Aunt as she pulled the car off of the highway and into the city turning left in a direction I had never been before. It was our first weekend of coaching school in Pittsburgh and I was feeling like a little kid entering her first day of kindergarten.
When it came time to decide how I would officially show up in the world, in my work, I was craving building things with people. I didn't necessarily want to deep dive into what had been, I wanted to help design extraordinary futures.
I have spent over a decade in creative and corporate environments working with teams to launch large scale initiatives. I wanted to find a way to honor that experience and bring it with me into the next chapter. I love big picture thinking, seeing how all of the dots connect and impact the bigger goal. Most importantly, I love stories. I was increasingly becoming more interested in the stories we tell ourselves. The more I explored the coaching profession the more it aligned with these values and desires.
The first weekend of coaching school was intense. All of us were new. New to the profession, new to going back to school, new to each other. We dived deeply into practicing skills right away and that is where stuff got real. All of the masks I had been wearing to show up in the world and cope were very quickly stripped away. In a matter of twenty and thirty-minute practice coaching sessions I was discovering parts of myself that I didn't even know were there, communicating desires I hadn't dared ever tell anyone. The safety that the coaching process provided me was incredible. I had found my people and for the first time in a long time, I was home.
I know it sounds dramatic. To imagine that a thirty-minute conversation could change your life is extreme, right? I thought so too, until I started having them. The truth is, it's not about making big scary moves when you’re trying to change. It is about the small and subtle adjustments you make that truly switch your perspective, that make the colors show up more brightly in the world, that change the way that you show up in the world.
Here is what I learned pretty much immediately: coaching is great for gaining clarity on what you truly desire and then taking steps in the direction of those desires. It is an exceptional tool for holding the big picture view in your mind while you work out the details and kinks down on the ground.
The spectrum of desires is broad. They can be associated with your work or career, like how to better manage your team or how to communicate your needs to your boss; i.e.: ask for a raise, build a strategic plan, pitch a big idea. They can be personal, like how to quit your job and start your business, how to better manage your business and manage your time, how to overcome the loss of a relationship or navigate a new transition; how to get a clear vision for a big decision or opportunity or how to love yourself better.
As I continued to attend coaching school weekend after weekend, the fire that had been burned out inside of me was ignited again. Not only were my own masks stripped away but my approach to helping others was radically changed. I was learning the neurology of change which, at a high level, is this concept that people change when they themselves come up with the idea of changing and the how of changing. Focusing on the scientific data around this concept really gave me confidence in these lessons. I learned that it is not my job to tell people what they should do or how they should behave it is my job and my honor to let my curiosity help them discover the answers that already live within them. I learned how to ask powerful questions, how to push the line when someone is on the edge of discovery, how to hold my client in their own strength so they can feel as powerful as they need to feel to make the change they want to make. I learned how to navigate the many complex parts of a person and how to help them really define their story or perhaps, completely change their story.
There is something really magical that happens when you are surrounded by people who want the best for you, who approach you with this sense of possibility. I started getting wild with my dreams and I started encouraging my clients to get wild with their dreams too.
Since I began my coaching business my clients have done some pretty extraordinary things. I am sharing them with you because I think it is important to be specific about how coaching can transform your life. This isn’t for everyone. If you are ready to truly tap into who you are and expand your impact whether that is on your family, yourself, your job, your company, your community, then coaching is definitely for you.
Big things my clients have done:
- Asked for a raise and a title bump and received a 30% pay increase and the recognition they desired
- Moved across the country and started their fitness business
- Quit their job and found a new job in a completely different field
- Landed their remote dream job and are now free to move wherever they want when they are ready
- Sold their first business with a positive exit and moved to a bigger market to launch their next big idea
- Built a retirement plan and made the transition to retire in Mexico
Coaching changed my life. I am not the same person who was sitting next to my aunt as we pulled onto campus for our first coaching weekend. I am stronger, clearer, more direct, more positive and more energized around possibility. I don’t pretend to think that it doesn’t take hard work. I am just really excited to do that hard work with my clients and of course, continually for myself.
If you have any further questions about the coaching process and would like more information, reach out! I’d love to hear from you. I offer 1:1 coaching to individual clients, group coaching within organizations and independent consulting on large scale media and community projects.